Avoid, avoid, avoid generic arguments and formula
statements. They work well to get a rough draft started, but will easily bore a
reader. Keep revising until the thesis reflects your real ideas.
Tip: The point you make in the paper should matter:
Be prepared to answer “So what?” about your thesis
statement.
Be prepared to explain why the point you are making is
worthy of a paper. Why should the reader read it?
Compare the following:
Original thesis:
There are advantages and disadvantages to using statistics.
(a fill-in-the-blank formula)
Revised theses:
Careful manipulation of data allows a researcher to use
statistics to support any claim she desires.
In order to ensure accurate reporting, journalists must
understand the real significance of the statistics they report.
Because advertisers consciously and unconsciously manipulate
data, every consumer should learn how to evaluate statistical claims.
Use your own words in thesis statements; avoid quoting.
Crafting an original, insightful, and memorable thesis makes a distinct
impression on a reader. You will lose credibility as a writer if you become
only a mouthpiece or a copyist; you will gain credibility by grabbing the
reader with your own ideas and words.
A well-crafted thesis statement reflects well-crafted ideas.
It signals a writer who has intelligence, commitment, and enthusiasm.
Is your thesis statement clear?
Your thesis statement is no exception to your writing: it
needs to be as clear as possible. By being as clear as possible in your thesis
statement, you will make sure that your reader understands exactly what you
mean.
Tip: In order to be as clear as possible in your writing:
Unless you're writing a technical report, avoid technical
language. Always avoid jargon, unless you are confident your audience will be
familiar with it.
Avoid vague words such as "interesting,”
"negative," "exciting,” "unusual," and "difficult."
Avoid abstract words such as "society," “values,”
or “culture.”
These words tell the reader next to nothing if you do not
carefully explain what you mean by them. Never assume that the meaning of a
sentence is obvious. Check to see if you need to define your terms
(”socialism," "conventional," "commercialism,"
"society"), and then decide on the most appropriate place to do so.
Do not assume, for example, that you have the same understanding of what
“society” means as your reader. To avoid misunderstandings, be as specific as
possible.
Is your thesis statement too general?
Your thesis should be limited to what can be accomplished in
the specified number of pages. Shape your topic so that you can get straight to
the "meat" of it. Being specific in your paper will be much more
successful than writing about general things that do not say much. Don't settle
for three pages of just skimming the surface.
The opposite of a focused, narrow, crisp thesis is a broad,
sprawling, superficial thesis. Compare this original thesis (too general) with
three possible revisions (more focused, each presenting a different approach to
the same topic):
Original thesis:
There are serious objections to today's horror movies.
Revised theses:
Because modern cinematic techniques have allowed filmmakers
to get more graphic, horror flicks have desensitized young American viewers to
violence.
The pornographic violence in "bloodbath" slasher
movies degrades both men and women.
Today's slasher movies fail to deliver the emotional catharsis
that 1930s horror films did.
What is a thesis statement?
Every paper you write should have a main point, a main idea,
or central message. The argument(s) you make in your paper should reflect this
main idea. The sentence that captures your position on this main idea is what
we call a thesis statement.
How long does it need to be?
A thesis statement focuses your ideas into one or two
sentences. It should present the topic of your paper and also make a comment
about your position in relation to the topic. Your thesis statement should tell
your reader what the paper is about and also help guide your writing and keep
your argument focused.
